First you think it. Then you act on it. Then you become it. That’s an age old adage for change. The concept is that you have to think about what you want to accomplish in life. How do you want to be remembered? What is your passion and purpose?
The second step is practice. Practice your purpose and passion. Fake it until you make it in order to get going in the direction of your goals. Faking it must not be confused with lying, but more like imitating. Imagine you are a person who is already that “thing you desire”. Taking action will allow you to eventually become that person you originally hoped to be.
The first ingredient to living a healthy lifestyle is to embrace and love you. Think and act like you love yourself to reverse any negative thoughts.
View the way you take care of yourself through diet, exercise and relationships with yourself and others as a way of showing yourself love.
Plan and set goals. Create structure to give you balance and a sense of stability.
Self-sabotage may occur when you’re subconsciously afraid of succeeding. Self sabotage manifests itself through fear of being successful and the need for perfection. Fear of success can be just as paralyzing as fear of failure. Many people fear success because it tests their limits and makes them vulnerable to new situations and confrontations. Success can expose weaknesses and vulnerabilities. Success forces people to deal with their own flaws or inner conflicts.
Success is scary because it involves change. Change is intimidating and hard to handle. With change comes success, but cannot be done without challenging yourself and being responsible to you.
Fear of success can come from fear that they can’t live up to their achievements. They don’t think they’re good enough or smart enough. They’re afraid they don’t have what it takes to rise to the challenge and they don’t know if they can sustain their success. This is where self sabotaging behavior comes in.
What’s the benefit of these self sabotaging behaviors? They provide an escape hatch. If you party the night before, put a project off until the last minute or shrug off your performance then you have an excuse for not doing well. Instead of facing the fear that you’re not good enough or smart enough you are equipped with the excuses to combat or justify failure.
Try to see your goals and successes as being flexible and adaptable. Nothing and no one is perfect. And you don’t have to be perfect to have success. Nothing is set in stone on how you must be to succeed. This could be one step in overcoming fear of success. Recognize tour skills, define your dreams. Be kind to yourself and realize your success comes from embracing the openness to change. Grow with practice and be resilient.
How do you know if you’re afraid of success? Some possible signs of self sabotage are:
- Procrastination: Putting off projects, assignments, or responsibilities while taking care of non-essential tasks. Working around the actual task at hand can be a sign of fear of success. If you putter around and are scattered instead of taking care of business or personal affairs, you may be subconsciously sabotaging yourself.
- All talk and no action: Sometimes certain behaviors look like laziness, but these actions reveal a fear of success. You may talk about your life, your dream and your goals, but do nothing to make them a reality. You never take practical steps or exert self-discipline to move in the direction of success.
- Negative, pessimistic thoughts and behaviors: Fear of success can involve an extremely negative perspective of life and the lives around you. What’s the point of dressing up and preparing for my interview? I probably won’t get the job anyway. Not putting forth effort or focusing on negativity equals self-sabotage. Self sabotage begins and ends with your thoughts.